Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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