have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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