you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Randomize