Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
