I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
