Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
