Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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