Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
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She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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