So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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