Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
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I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
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The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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