no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
The power of my boobs compel you
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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