Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize