You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
