do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
