people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
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I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
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The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I did not marry a roomba.
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