I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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