what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
