Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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