and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize