i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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