i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
