She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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