I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
