I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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