at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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