i jhust puked up my retainher.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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