Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
