sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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