I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
