Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
