Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
