I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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