If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
