and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize