Nicole vs. Life
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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