Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Randomize
