I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
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someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
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Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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