He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
