my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
