The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I deserve this hangover.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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