Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
