Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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