all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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