Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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