It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
The struggles of a small town man whore
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize