halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
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I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
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My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.