that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
