On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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