I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize