I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
that may or may not have been my penis.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
