i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
