So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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